Alright Shaqheads: now we're making things more challenging. It's one thing for the Diesel to completely dominate the present, but he's also the only way to understand the past. What if all of history were reduced to Shaqness?
If Shaq had been King of England in 1775, the American colonists would have protested Shaqxation without representation.
Leave your historical Shaqorisms in the comments below, or tweet them our way @ifshaqwere.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
The Top 10 Cinematic Shaqorisms...
Well, as you might expect, we've had a massive number of suggestions this round. Whittling down to just ten has been difficult, and credit is hard to dole out perfectly, because lots of folks offered similar ideas. Again, the order here is unscientific... the only certain thing is that the ENTIRE WORLD OF CINEMATIC DRAMA has now been reduced to the DIESEL of SHAQNESS.
Let's get things started with the best Scarface submission we got, since that's one of Shaq's personal favorite films, and roll from there:
10. If Shaq played the lead role in Scarface, he'd refine his acting genius by channeling his inner Al Shaqino (@jstormtwits)
9. If Shaq dished out the celebrity dirt, it would be called Shaqccess Hollywood. (@samgf)
8. Shaq goes to prison: The Shawshaq Redemption (@Michael Molinar)
7. Shaquille O'Neal gives up his police duties and works as a fireman in: SHAQdraft (@ahuff32)
6. If Shaq were the lovable star of the "Pirates Of The Caribbean" series, he would be Captain Shaq Sparrow. (@marnykins)
Let's get things started with the best Scarface submission we got, since that's one of Shaq's personal favorite films, and roll from there:
10. If Shaq played the lead role in Scarface, he'd refine his acting genius by channeling his inner Al Shaqino (@jstormtwits)
9. If Shaq dished out the celebrity dirt, it would be called Shaqccess Hollywood. (@samgf)
8. Shaq goes to prison: The Shawshaq Redemption (@Michael Molinar)
7. Shaquille O'Neal gives up his police duties and works as a fireman in: SHAQdraft (@ahuff32)
6. If Shaq were the lovable star of the "Pirates Of The Caribbean" series, he would be Captain Shaq Sparrow. (@marnykins)
5. If there were a horror flick about all the opposing centers that feared Shaq, it would be Ashaqnaphobia. (@willygray)
4. If Shaq hosted the Academy Awards, Kobe Bryant, Dwyane Wade, and Penny Hardaway would all be nominated for Best Supporting Shaqtor. (@ifshaqwere)
3. If Shaq were the subject of one of Phil Jackson's tasteless jokes, he'd be Brokeshaq Mountain. (@mgottfried)
2. The genre including Kazaam, Blue Chips, and Steel is known as Shaqsploitation cinema. (@ifshaqwere)
1. If Shaq turned green, he'd become Shraq. (@ifshaqwere)
3. If Shaq were the subject of one of Phil Jackson's tasteless jokes, he'd be Brokeshaq Mountain. (@mgottfried)
2. The genre including Kazaam, Blue Chips, and Steel is known as Shaqsploitation cinema. (@ifshaqwere)
1. If Shaq turned green, he'd become Shraq. (@ifshaqwere)
Monday, May 11, 2009
Welcome New Shaqheads!
Hi Folks,
Obviously we've had a lot of new visitors since Shaq linked to us from his Twitter page last night. Take a look at our Open Letter to Shaq and peruse some of our posts below to get an idea of what we're up to, and follow us on twitter (@ifshaqwere). Tomorrow, we'll post the top 10 movie Shaqorisms, and then we'll introduce a new challenge. Reading Shaqorisms is fun, but making them up yourself is even more fun!
We hope you enjoy the concept, and thanks Shaq for the shout out!
If Shaq were a prehistoric flying beast, he would be a Pteroshaqtyl.
Obviously we've had a lot of new visitors since Shaq linked to us from his Twitter page last night. Take a look at our Open Letter to Shaq and peruse some of our posts below to get an idea of what we're up to, and follow us on twitter (@ifshaqwere). Tomorrow, we'll post the top 10 movie Shaqorisms, and then we'll introduce a new challenge. Reading Shaqorisms is fun, but making them up yourself is even more fun!
We hope you enjoy the concept, and thanks Shaq for the shout out!
If Shaq were a prehistoric flying beast, he would be a Pteroshaqtyl.
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