Monday, March 23, 2009

The Top Ten Economic Shaqorisms...

The wait is over! In unscientific order, the top ten economic shaqorisms are:

10. If Shaq created a comprehensive plan to solve the financial crisis, it would be the seminal work of Shaqroeconomics. (@ifshaqwere)
9. In Shaqroeconomic theory, pure Diesel is the only acknowledged shaqtor of production. (@WillyGray)
8. Shaq is so rich, he's in his own Shaq's Bracket (@ifshaqwere)
7. If Shaq were a piece of US Currency, he would be the Shaqagawea Dollar Coin. (@gonadsgo)
6. If Shaq had to do a variety of odd jobs to survive during the recession, he would be a Shaq of all trades. (@samgf)
5. If Shaq were a technology stock, he'd be traded on the NASHAQ (@gonadsgo)
4. If Shaq were an i-banker, he'd specialize in mergers and shaquisitions. (@heathstreet)
3. If Shaq were a strategy in Keynesian economics, he'd be the Big Stimulus Shaqage (@greatwave)
2. When Shaq personally guarantees the value of your home, it becomes a mortgage-shaqed security. (@brittanw)
1. If Congress called upon Shaq to use his mathematical skills to monitor AIG's risk levels so that it would never again require a bailout, he would become the Big Shaqtuary... and his bonus would be fucking huge. (@willygray, @theanimalbeast)

2 comments:

  1. Honorable mentions include:

    If Shaq were a Civil War currency, he'd be greenshaqs (Jen C.); Even during the recession, Shaq is so rich he's a still a shaquillionaire (@gonadsgo); If Shaq decided to outsource, he would move all his shaqtories overseas (@samgf); If Shaq ran the SEC, he would have put an end to all of Bernie Madoff's shaqounting shenanigans. (Kate T.); the point at which the supply of shaq's tweets matches the demand of his twitteronian followers is known as the market shaquilibrium. (@theanimalbeast); If Shaq desgined a management system, it would be called Six Shaqma, and its only tenet would be dunking. (@mrsfridaynext)

    More always welcome!

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  2. ....lol, i might have to kill myself from laughing insanely at this stuff. best.

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